Rebs to host Gardner-Webb... Wow.

The oh-so-wackily elusive 12th opponent on our 2009 football schedule will almost certainly be Gardner-Webb. Who/What exactly is Gardner-Webb? They're a Division II school from Boiling Springs, North Carolina. Their athletic teams are the Runnin' Bulldogs which is a creative stupid twist on the all too popular canine mascot.

Run, Bulldog, Run!

This is, of course, a damned embarrassment. We shouldn't ever play two Division II (do NOT comment with the whole "omg it's FCS now u dumb@$$lmao" bit) teams in one season. Ever. Ever, ever, ever. The blame for this can be placed at the feet of two groups:

1. Our athletics administration (who's shocked by this one?). This should have been taken care of months, if not years ago.
2. TCU, UVA, Indiana, and other puss-ass schools who didn't want to schedule the Rebels despite having similar open-dates and scheduling issues. I'm especially tiffed with you, Horned Frogs, with your whole "BCS Buster" persona. If you want to "bust" the BCS you should schedule a team that's worth a damn. Some "people" may scoff at this notion, but those teams were simply viewing a matchup with the Rebs as a probable loss and didn't want that on their schedule.

Anyway, the game is slated for September 12 and should see Nathan Stanley completing a touchdown pass to a wide open Richie Contartesi at least twice.

More Gifts for the Obamas

After seeing the piece of luggage gifted to then-Senator Obama by our beloved university and how much our President appreciates it (see: just enough to actually use it) I decided that we should all pitch in and snag a few of the following for the Obama family:

For Michelle, a lovely set of bed linens and drapes. Trust me, Madame First Lady, they look much better with the lights off. ;) ;) :P
For Sasha and Malia, a pair of terrific backpacks! Now you can carry all of your schoolbooks in style! Whoah! Slow down there girls, don't fight over 'em! There are plenty of backpacks to go around!
And for Barack we'd like to gift a t-shirt to commemorate the weekend of the Presidential Debate at Ole Miss!

Send any and all thank you letters stimulus checks to Andy Kennedy's defense team.



P.S. - Damn, I hate our marketing department.

Does Shep Smith work for TIME now?

Barack Obama's bag luggage was carried off of Air Force One today.

I bet the recruits are going to come to Ole Miss now!!1LOL!!! You can't BUY that type of publicity!!!

...I hate our fans...

Mercer???? WTF?

One Man to Beat, his wife and I were thoroughly disgusted with the defensive effort of the Rebels today. The Rebels fell 13-11, and they looked like they were lost defensively.

After getting up 11-6, the Rebel defense gave up 7 unanswered runs. Yesterday, the bullpen was the strength of the team, and today the bullpen was awful. That compounded with poor fielding spelled disaster.

THREE ERRORS? Beside the three errors, Jordan Henry dropped a ball in center field that was ruled a hit. Absolutely pitiful on the defensive side of the ball.

THE GOOD:

-Brett Basham was really good at and behind the plate. Not only did he throw a runner out, he went three for five with a three run homer.
-Logan Power was also good at the plate with a MONSTER two run shot that traveled at least 400 feet over the left field wall.
-Matt Smith has much better plate discipline this season and has shown the ability to take the ball to opposite field. He only had one hit today, but he looks much better at the plate.
-Overall, the team has shown much better plate discipline.

THE BAD:

-The team didn't show much motivation or desire for victory. In the eighth and ninth innings, they finally had some yelling and shouting going on from the players in the dugout. It seemed like a heartless effort.
-Matt Smith and Jordan Henry went a combined 2-9.

THE UGLY:

-3 errors? My goodness... When it really mattered, our infield did not have the ability to make the plays or communicate. Button dropped a force out that was thrown to him at third, Corrigan made an error throwing to first and Basham was called for an error by being called for catcher interference.
-Our bullpen was atrocious. David Goforth WALKED in the go ahead run. They allowed seven runs overall (5 earned).


Random notes:

Scott Bittle was not even dressed out until the ninth inning when he was sent to the bullpen.

This team has a large following, and there was a great crowd there to support the Rebels.

Taylor Hightower made his first appearance as a Rebel by pinch running for Brett Basham.

OMG WE BEAT STATE IN RECRUITING LET"S MAKE A VIDEO

I'll never understand when fans make stupid videos that they think are funny.



Wow... genius. That was clever. I see what you did there... ha. The bulldog... his face... eyes... mouth... hilarity.

Hey, at least it's funnier than this one.

The Giggity Song

This is what I did with my Sunday afternoon. Hopefully you'll recognize it as a response to the famed Coach O "Yaw Yaw" song.



Lyrics, music, and video by yours truly.

EDIT: Yes, I know, I'm not a great singer. Sue me.

A Defense for Jevan Snead

People were actually booing Jevan Snead during the early parts of the Auburn game. Yes, as unbelievable as that may sound, the greatest offensive producer the Rebels have had since Eli Manning was being booed because of his slow start.

We all saw that Jevan had a poor first half, but he did nothing to jeopardize a victory. He threw no interceptions and did a decent job of keeping the Auburn defense at bay. True, he did make some horrible throws and true, his receivers weren't helping very much but Jevan most certainly did nothing which would warrant him being booed by his home crowd.

If you booed Jevan Snead you're likely an idiot.

Here you'll see the SEC statistics leaders. Scroll down to the passing categories and take a look at Jevan's numbers as they stack up against other SEC quarterbacks. What? You're too lazy to do that? Well, fine, I snagged a screen capture.

Look. While Jevan isn't setting the world on fire, he's certainly far from horrible. Yeah, he and Casey Dick lead the conference in INTs (which has subsequently hurt his efficiency rating) but he is tied with Tim "Heisman" Tebow for the most TD tosses in conference. He's third in yards per game. Third! Jevan has secured his place as the third best quarterback in the conference with behind Stafford and Tebow who, without any doubt in my mind, have better lines, receivers, and coaches.

Yet, you asshats booed him. That's ok, though. He showed up after his rocky start, tossed his two touchdowns and left the field a winner.

Snead is young and has only had this season to really play football (as opposed to true juniors Stafford and Tebow) and has showed us that he'll keep our passing offense at a truly competitive level over the next three seasons. Give him the credit he deserves, especially when he's just having a slow start to an early-day game.

No More Elvis?

Starting Saturday, the administration is doing away with playing Elvis on the PoweTron.

While nothing close to a longstanding Ole Miss tradition, having Elvis Presley sing "American Trilogy" on our big-ass HD screen after home games is, at least conceptually, pretty damn cool. Think about it, one of Mississippi's native children singing the song which inspired one of the greatest marching band songs in the Southeastern Conference on a screen which is using enough electricity to power 2.5 Congos (or at least 1 Burkina Fasao).

It doesn't matter who you are; that's pretty damn cool.

You know what else is pretty damn cool? Elvis.

You know what isn't? Chanting "The South Will Rise Again."

Now, we at le Cup have a trustworthy source telling us that the main reason for the doing away of the King has mostly to do with whoever's in charge of these kinds of things not asking for permission from the Presley estate (seriously, how absolutely stupid can you be?). Of course, history indicates that we've got a dumb enough administration for that to be true, but you know (and our source confirms) that the "traditional" chanting of TSWRA after "From Dixie With Love" had at least something to do with this change.

This bugs the shit out of me.

While I feel our administration's efforts to better the university's image have largely been successful and forward thinking, this one is just stupid. Of course, if license issues are involved then there isn't really anything we or anyone else can say. Our administration didn't ask for permission to play a video of Elvis Presley on our jumbotron and somehow thought that wasn't going to be an issue.

Dumb, dumb, dumb... but forgivable.

But, if they feel that folks are crying "racism" because of an Elvis song, they're way off base. And, another thing, if they think that this song was encouraging the chanting of TSWRA they were also incredibly mistaken.

Personally, I never heard it said during the Elvis video, but I'm not about to deny it's existence. It likely happened and it was certainly as disgusting as always. However, Elvis may just be the key we need to get this scourge of a "tradition" removed from Vaught-Hemingway altogether.

Here, let me try to get the message across:

---

Chanters of "The South Will Rise Again,"

What in the fuck are you doing? Look, I know you think Ole Miss is all "old timey" and "Southern" and shit but let's get one thing straight: TSWRA isn't cool. I know you and your buddies from suburban Dallas/Atlanta/St. Louis love pack up your F250's with cans of dip, drive down to Oxford, start saying y'all, and pretending like you enjoy cole slaw.

It's cute. It's endearing.

It shows us real folks from the Magnolia State that you find Mississippi to be a pretty damned cool place. Folks like me who grew up here, however, don't go around wearing stripmall linens while listening to Lynard Skynard and hating black people. And we certainly do not chant "The South Will Rise Again" (or at least those of us who are really worth a damn).

We don't chant TSWRA because, as Mississippians, we've learned that our shit has already risen.

"What?!?! That's preposterous! I'm from suburban Atlanta, God dammit and we have URBAN OUTFITTERS! You haven't risen."

Bullshit we haven't. Mississippi (and the South) did rise again when Elvis Aaron Presley took the motherfucking world by storm.

You think TSWRA is cool? You think you're cool? Naw, motherfucker. Elvis was cool. No matter how many Ole Miss blogs I run; no matter how many unsolicited high-fives I get; no matter how many Airships shows I go to, I will never, not in a billion years, be half as cool as Elvis fucking Presley. You, as well, need to come to terms with your plight.

Elvis was a young man from Tupelo, Mississippi who started his recording career in Memphis, Tennessee. He was a man who loved his God, family, and country before fame and money. He was a man who could sing and dance the panties off of any woman on Earth.

And guess what. He sang "His truth is marching on" at the end of American Trilogy.

You know why? Because those are the actual fucking lyrics, you douche. Stop making my state and school look bad.

If Elvis were still alive, he'd kick your ass, burn your F250, and sit on your limp body while he ate a catfish dinner. Then, he'd write you a check for the medical bills and the truck (because he fucking can) before leaving it in your back pocket.

Elvis starts trends. You don't. End of story.

---

Ole Miss administration, listen up. Having Elvis on the PoweTron is a great idea, especially after a win. I, along with many others, found it quite fitting after the Memphis victory. Get the rights to play it and let these asshats see , in the presence of their King, that they are the lowliest of peons.

Post game tidbits

Whiskey Wednesday will (hopefully) deliver his usual, profanity-laden post game report as soon as he wakes from his somewhat comatose state. Until then, I'll give you these post game tidbits.

1. Terrence "Mount" Cody is an overrated pile of adipose tissue with skin stitched over it. He was certainly not the factor he's been made out to be. Also, we ruined his knee which is one of those things that makes you, as an Ole Miss fan, shamefully grin. We've gotta take 'em where we can get 'em. Below is some footage of Mount Cody in Tuscaloosa yesterday.


2. Jevan Snead stepped it up big time against the Tide. Those runs in the 4th quarter were ballsy and took real athleticism. He showed great arm strength and stood tall in the pocket despite fighting a tough uphill battle. The incomplete pass to end the game was likely a communication issue between he and McCluster. That's a nice segue into my next point...

3. Dexter, srsly... Don't throw the ball anymore. Stop fumbling. Ole Miss fans really love you. We at the Cup love you. But you've gotta stop ending crucial drives because of thoughtless slip-ups.

4. Greg Hardy wears special shoes? What the fuck is that all about? Considering his recent foot surgery it makes some sense, but just the idea of a big scary bastard like Hardy needing "special" footwear is silly and (honestly) kinda funny. Seriously though, he either doesn't give that much of a damn about his NFL prospects or is too full of himself to realize that he's pissing away big bucks with this kind of crap. As fans, we think Greg Hardy is great. Watching him really lay into quarterbacks is some of the most exciting stuff we Rebels have to look forward to every Saturday. But he needs to play with some effort if we're going to show him any more respect. Greg, if you're reading this, take a lesson from Patrick Willis' "school of giving NFL scouts a boner." The guy was the best linebacker in college football, yet still practiced and played like he was trying to earn a starting spot. NFL scouts love that kinda stuff and P Willie with his Bentleys, house on San Francisco bay, and platoon of ladyfriends can attest to that.

EDIT: For shiggles, I Google image searched "Special Shoes" and got these. If anybody sees any of these in or around Oxford, deliver 'em to Hardy because he's apparently misplaced his.



EDIT^2: Let's throw some YouTube in there, for good measure.

Is Greg Hardy out?

There are all kinds of rumors floating around concerning the status of Greg Hardy as an Ole Miss Rebel. We all know he is a major primadonna, but if the rumors of the team voting him off Survivor style are true then this has gotten way outta hand. Check out NAFOOM if you would like to read the thread concerning this.

We're likely not going to post something until it becomes made factually clear to us.

"What's that," you ask. "Integrity?"

No, not really. We're just lazy.

Are you ready? Yes, for a celebrity.

The pre-game/Allstate/Big Buck Sports/Newk's/Rebel Rags Hotty Toddy has been lacking of late. For the South Carolina game, they brought in Montgomery Gentry, which is a knock off Brooks 'n' Dunn. Vanderbilt was Jim Nantz, which I'm sure took one phone call due to media connections. Memphis had the Nutt, which is completely appropriate.

Oh I forgot Samford, and who wouldn't? It's Samford. They could've gotten Jessica Simpson's boobs to do the Hotty Toddy, and we still wouldn't have sold that damn place out.

With this in mind, it's time to realize that we may never have a big time celebrity come in and do the Hotty Toddy, so let's look at a few future prospects that would send me to the limits of my sanity.

1.) Frank Caliendo- Oh, I get it. You do impersonations to be funny. Very fresh idea, and while your Charles Barkley is amazing, I can't stand this guy. I hope he turns into the next Carrot Top....seriously, where the hell is that guy these days?

2.) Scott Stapp- Name doesn't ring a bell? The former lead singer for Creed? There's been plenty of hate on this guy, but if he ever does the Hotty Toddy, that's the day I hand in my Ole Miss fandom. He's the definition of a no-talent ass clown. The announcer at the Southland Greyhound park has more talent(you know, the guy that says, "here comes Rusty" on the homestretch).

3.) Gilbert Gottfried- Here's an asshole whose claim to fame is the fact that he's annoying. Plus, he tried to cheat Kelly, Zach and the gang out of their money when they were in Las Vegas. C'mon, you know you watched it.

The disappointing thing is that many Rebel fans would probably be excited to have any of these E-list celebrities. We've raised the standard for our team on the field, now it's time to raise the pre-game atmosphere to where it needs to be.

Sports Illustrated Cover

Uh-oh.

Senator McCain Suspends Campaign

WE ARE ... OLE MISS!

Post-'Game' Report

Well Ole Miss fans... wonder why 'game' is in quotations in the title? Games have a set system of rules, adhered to in the spirit of equitable competition. Then there was this 'game...' It started with 7 free points awarded to Wake. Apparently, it is a sound and legitimate strategy to push a punt return blocker into his returner after a fair catch, cause a fumble, and recover. Seven free Wake Forest points. Fine. Continue to the rest of the game, where Ole Miss beats Wake 28-20. No matter, however, officials to the rescue! Pass interference call on Marshay Green on Wake's late drive. Marshay has the position, and his eyes on the ball. Usually, pass interference on the defense does not occur in this situation, unless the officials have interest vested in the outcome of the game. 15 yards, automatic first down. Also, thanks for reviewing the obvious Ole Miss TD beforehand, just to make sure. Glad to know we're interested in the fair outcome. So then, with seconds left and 41 yards to the FG, Skinner drops back IN THE POCKET, throws the ball out of bounds, 15 feet over the receiver's head, and flags remain in pockets. While Wake fans are well-versed in rules involving double-dribbles and moving picks, they (and officials) might be surprised to learn that such a play is the classical rule-bending situation that constituted the inception of the INTENTIONAL GROUNDING rule. Penalty at the spot of the foul, loss of down. Instead, 10 free points. Wake (read: Duke basketball) fans may not be convinced, but Ole Miss wins this game with legit officiating 8 of 10 times. We are the better team. You have no Snead. You have no McCluster. You have no Bolden. You have no Hodge. You have an arbitrarily assigned pre-season ranking, protected as long as you are the only ranked ACC team. Enjoy it.
Ole Miss gets fucked out of a game a year, on average, and you've already cashed in.

While Ole Miss won this game on the field, here are a few observations that may have caused us to win by two or three touchdowns:

You have to wonder why we kept it in the Wild Rebel so often. Dex throws a stupid pick, we get stuffed a couple times... Also, why not run it more often on 1st and 2nd down? We have a clear physical advantage. We are better on both lines. Use it. Use Bolden to his strengths. Don't make Jevan win the game for us in the air. No doubt, Jevan did win us the game, but ended up losing the 'game.' Guess you have to play with the hand you're dealt, which meant giving Wake as few offensive plays as possible, even though we stopped them three times more than the scoreboard indicated (the personal foul kicker interference on Trahan was Busch League).

Tackle better. This is something that has improved more, but must improve more if we are to beat SEC teams. Watching Auburn today, the reason they won despite some turnovers was their sound tackling and quickness to the ball. We were lax in that department probably six or eight times, allowing a couple of first downs that shouldn't have been converted, and a sack or two that should've been wrapped up.

Whether you or an Ole Miss or a Wake fan, you have to agree: we have the players and the coach in place. This game was winnable, but, fair or not (I say bullshit), the breaks went Wake's way at home as the only ranked team in a BCS conference struggling for validity. Ole Miss will win some SEC games. Wake, an ACC title contender, would win three or four in the SEC.

I still feel good about the Rebs. Wake, enjoy your 'win' in this 'game.'

Ouch...

So, you remember how we are really deep on the defensive line? I mean, we have one of the best defensive lines in the country if not the nation...

Well, we HAD one at least.

I guess everyone just needs to remember. We... are... Ole.... Miss.

That is all.

We are... Ole Miss.

So... we're going to be thin on the offensive line in 2009, right? Well, because we're Ole Miss, we're about to be thinner.

Kermit Tyler, a three star guard from Louisiana with a Rutgers offer, will no longer be playing football due to an undisclosed "medical condition".

Great. Just what we needed. I know that he wasn't highly rated, but he was one of four offensive line signees, and he was the only one I was excited about.

Please... for the love of God... John Jerry. Please come back for your senior year.

Why we like Houston Nutt

He isn't this guy:


We get it, alright. You despise Houston Nutt. He's got an ego, pissed off Mitch Mustain, has a predictable offense, wears goofy hats, had an affair with a weather lady, sells snake oil, delivers trite press conferences, has really strong thumb muscles, and has a demeanor characteristic of a well-groomed Yosemite Sam.

Guess what. We don't fucking care. He may exhibit every single one of the qualities you have mentioned but he isn't the nation's biggest college football related punchline after Charlie Weis' girth and Lou Holtz's lisp. 20% of Houston Nutt's 10 seasons at Arkansas were losing seasons; 100% of O's 3 were. Does that make any sort of sense to you? Houston Nutt will win games in Oxford. Despite your wildest fantasies (which I think involve HDN, a meteor-strike, and the bubonic plague), Nutt will do good things for our program.

We're excited about him being here, just as you are excited about Petrino's arrival in Fayetteville. Why is that such a hard pill for you to swallow? We're glad to have a coach that, compared to Orgeron at least, is respected on a national level yet you don't want us to be excited. You want us to be miserable.

Here's a hypothetical: if we were to curse HDN just as you are-I'm talking 100% bat-shit crazy hatred for the guy-would you be behaving with feelings of sympathy towards us Rebel fans? I doubt it.

Give it a rest. We'll see you in October.



PS - Comments redacted. There's nothing you can say that we haven't heard and there's nothing we can say that you haven't heard. You know this, we know this. We're both incredibly proud fanbases and we're not about to let someone at the helm of a laptop change any of that. Some of you will likely snicker, click over to your Myspace, and call us a bunch of "bruised pussy havin' cowards" but, if you are as enlightened and educated as you claim to be, I imagine most of you will let the dust settle until football season.

Powe-tron RENDERED!

The long wait is over. THE POWE-TRON IS HERE! Well, sort of... computer renderings have been released. That's better than nothing though, right... actually, I think that's the same as nothing.

I love it how people go ga-ga over renderings of construction. Generally, the renderings aren't too accurate. While, unlike most renderings, there isn't a smiling, happy conglomerate of racially unintelligible people walking around in the stadium ("Is that guy orange?"), I have to say that I'm still impressed with this image. If this thing looks like the image they released, it's going to be great. The screen itself is larger than the entire "jumbo"tron. Sure, it's not as good as our suggestion, but it'll do.

Kudos to you Ole Miss administration. Even though you didn't get us SOME DAMNED PERSONALIZED SPRING GAME CUPS, you did get us a state of the art video board. I guess that makes up for it, but next year... I want to see a spring game cup with some third-grade reading level innovative phrase like, "Getcha some!" or "COLOSSAL!" or or "GOIN' NUTTS!" or "Blood... everywhere, I don't... I don't know what happe- OH NO! I FEEL THE RAGE COMING AGAIN!!1!eleven"

Ouch

I hate March Madness.
HT: AngryReb