Now THIS Is Just Adorable

Get ready, Tiger fans. You're going to want to start rooting for the Rebels.

Because down in Death Valley, they've figured out that a Rebel trip to Orlando, is the only chance they've got at Dallas.

Tell 'em 'bout it, JoJo:

"The key is if the Capital One Bowl in Orlando takes Cotton Bowl target Ole Miss instead of Georgia, which it has been courting for weeks. But on Saturday, BCS No. 11 Georgia was upset by BCS No. 22 Georgia Tech, 45-42, and fell to No. 16 in the BCS and to 9-3 on the season with its second loss in four games ... If Ole Miss does go to the Capital One, the Outback Bowl in Tampa is then expected to take Georgia out of the SEC East, leaving the Cotton Bowl no choice but to take 7-5 LSU out of the SEC West."

I've decided that there may be no more satisfying piece of journalism composed since the dawn of man than that which recognizes the dim and dreary reality that Les Miles and LSU would be "chosen" because there was, literally, no one else.

While part of me want LSU to be left out of its most desired bowl location, I cannot dispel the schadenfreude that would most certainly result from watching the Tigers' suddenly non-existent defense being eaten alive bite by bite by good ol' Graham and the Lubbuccaneers, leaving Les Miles feeling rather like the victim of those wicked freaking ants from the new Indiana Jones movie.

Oh the Look on Les' Face

If you've got your own caption or speech bubbles, go for it.

Les Miles: You Only Thought He Had Cajones.

This is ... this is just ... just too good to be true.

So, we all know how much Ryan Perrilloux totally blows. The answer: a lot. And, just in case you're too busy to click the links (which are absolutely incredible, by the way), here's, more or less, what happened: Perrillouxzzr was just trying to get dranked at a local brew-pubbery, when this guy, or someone like him, refused this modest request because "they were closed."

I just can't imagine this happening in Oxford. Here's the scenario: Jevan Sneed walks in to Parrish Baker's house at, I don't know, 3:47 a.m. on a Sunday morning. Would you expect Parrish to (a) call the cops, (b) have an intervention with the young man, or (c) tell Jevan that of course it's still Whiskey Wednesday and, by the way, this one is on the house!

I know what I'd do.

I mean, I hope El Sombrero isn't so gosh-darn embarrassed by Perrillouxzzr that he boots this guy right out of the State of Louisiana because a train-wreck like Ryan Perrilloux is certain to do more damage to this football team. This is, literally, the only pop culture reference I can think of that accurately reflects the recklessness of even letting this guy on a college campus, much less on the football team. And, of course, word is that The Mad Hatter has telephoned the owner of the establishment and the police offering his apologies.

Needless to say, there's two extra scoops of crazy in Baton Rouge right now.

EDIT: Apparently it's all just a clever rouse (Rouxzze?) and the restaurant is denying the aforementioned event ever occurred.
















"Err, yes.... that's the story.... nothing happened, nothing happened at all...."

Every day is April Fool's day for Perrillouxzzr!

Ryan Perrillouxzzr continues to think he's too cool for school and is yet to practice during LSU spring drills. Apparently, Les "El Sombrero" Miles set forth a set of guidelines for the Bayou Bengal quarterback which he must hurdle in order to be allowed back on the practice field.

He hasn't.

I know, I know, we're all shocked.

"What!?! Perrilouxzzr a rulebreaker?!?"

The Root of All Evil: Money or Ryan Perrillouxzzr?

HA HA! Trick question, Lewis Black, they are one in the same. And now Coach Les Miles has pulled another one out of his hat, unsuspending his star domestic abuser and chronic gambler quarterback. WBRZ Channel 2 News has it that Perriloux's suspension is over and the star junior might even return to the team before spring drills end on April 5, presumably so that he will not have this heavy burden weighing him down during finals.

“I just want to make sure he’s doing the work in the classroom and taking care of business," Miles said.

All signs indicate that Perrilloux is doing just that. He has NCAA Tourney Pools circulating in four of his five classes, "tricked out" his "boo" to his pathetic Psych 101 professor, and is currently managing over 200 CentSports profiles.

Jam.

When reached for comment, Senior Solo Cup SEC Analyst Jackie Sherril responded, "Is this really a smart way to run your football program?"