The Grades are in: SEC East

The grades for the West can be found here.

Florida: A+

You're welcome, Timmy. VICARIOUS NATIONAL CHAMPS, MAWFUKKAZ!

Florida earns a well deserved "A+" because... well, really, I shouldn't need to explain further. They won the BCS Championship, dammit. The SEC owns all of you.

Vanderbilt: A-- (Yes, that's "A minus minus")

If this were anybody but Vanderbilt, they'd have gotten a low "C" or a high "D." Starting 5-0 and earning a #13 ranking, only to lose to Mississippi State and begin a slide into 6-6 is, by the standards of folks who have been to bowl games over the last two decades, pretty bad. But, it's Vanderbilt and they just won a bowl game against a BCS team. My dad was four years old the last time that happened.

But, Ghost, there wasn't a BCS back then.

Shut the hell up. Don't you think I know that?

Anyway, here's something neato on which to chew: Boston College had the longest bowl victory streak in America until the 'Dores showed up. On your victories over ranked teams and bowl championship, congrats Vanderbilt. As for next year, well, I don't really have any clue what's going to happen then. Google up a Vandy blog or something.

Georgia: B-

Matt Stafford is showing you the number two, as in how many more games the Bulldogs should have won. The curse of the preseason AP #1 lives on. Losing to Florida is understandable. Perhaps not by that margin, but still, they're good. Losing to Georgia Tech and Alabama shouldn't be. Alabama shouldn't have been able to score so many points in the first half while simple, fundamental tackling would have kept the Yellowjackets out of the endzone on a few of those long touchdown runs.

Their offensive line was young and their defense was overrated. Knowshon Moreno and Matthew Stafford are legitimate, first-round NFL prospects but it takes more than that to create the national championship caliber team we were all led to believe the Bulldogs were going to be.

Without Stafford and Moreno, their offense should have some trouble getting into a groove next season. As the season progresses, so should the Bulldogs but I cannot imagine them winning more than 10 games in 2009-10 with the Oklahoma State, Arizona State, LSU, and Arkansas on their schedule.

Kentucky: C-

Kentucky jumped quickly out of the gate but faded in the stretch (get it... horse jokes? nobody?). Before everyone realized how awful Louisville actually was, I was very impressed with Kentucky's opening performance. However, after having only won two SEC games by a grand total of two points, it became apparent that Kentucky simply wasn't that strong of a squad.

Their bowl win did impress many, though. To rally from behind by using solid, solid defense takes talent and, get this, good coaching. Kentucky won their third bowl game in a row which, three years ago, would have been a laughable statement.

Hartline needs to step it up and Kentucky needs to amplify their offense significantly in order to improve for 2009. They were very good defensively, but simply couldn't find the endzone as often as they should have.

South Carolina: D+

Stephen Garcia looks bummed that String Cheese Incident cancelled their recent Columbia show. Anyway, South Carolina did what South Carolina does: wiped their collective ass on their expectations. Their season began in similar fashion to Ole Miss' with a good mix of wins and losses but, after week 3 or 4, the Gamecocks went on a tear winning 6 of 7. Sitting on a 7-3 record, the 'Cocks looked like a legitimate dark horse in the SEC East (as much of one as you can be when the BCS champs are involved, that is). Unfortunately, Steve Spurrier must have misplaced his refrigerator magnet schedule thingy because the Gamecocks didn't even show up to their three final games, losing all three by a combined score of 118-30. Were they, for the most of the season, a better team than Kentucky? Absolutely, but their season's end was putrid enough to sink them below the Wildcats.

If South Carolina's quarterback situation can be remedied, even in the slightest, they should see marked improvement for next season.

Tennessee: F

I mean, who in the hell loses to Wyoming?

*Man in suit leans over to a strident Ghost of Jay Cutler. Covering his earpiece with his fingertip, he hurriedly whispers into Ghost's ear.*

pssha-pssa-tapssshss-tapsshshst

Uh huh?

apssshhha-pssh-psshht

Oh, I see... Ahem, while losses to such storied programs as the Wyoming Cowboys and the UCLA Bruins should be expected with such a murder's row of an OOC schedule, Tennessee should not have struggled as they did against their SEC foes. Losses to Auburn and South Carolina could have been avoided had the Vols played as they did against the Mississippi State Bulldogs and the Wildcats of Kentucky. Their play on the field was rarely good, primarily inconsistent, and oftentimes just plain bad.

The Lane Kiffin hire is interesting in that he is bringing in proven coaches and/or coordinators to hopefully pick up where he leaves off. Tennessee is too talented to win a mere 5 games next season but, if the "talent" wearing the headsets can't get it together quickly, the Volunteers could have another forgettable season.

Ole Miss - 31, National champs - 30.... You honestly think this is cool?

"Oh my God, we just beat Florida!"

These are the words of a one Juco All-American, a rogue bloggeur with a love and knowledge of Ole Miss unlike most. At the time of this utterance, the Ole Miss Rebels had pulled off what then seemed to be the most unlikely of upsets. It was a damn, damn good feeling which proved to be the first in a long string of good feelings. This season was incredibly memorable and absolutely thrilling to watch (and subsequently blog). During the points-orgy that was the 2nd half of our season, our middle fingers flew high, bourbon flowed like the Mississippi, and every Hotty was Toddied.

Yet, now, after all of those successes, folks are still stuck on beating Florida. They want to sell you ugly t-shirts and bumper stickers and whatnot because "DAMMIT WE BEAT FLORIDA WHOOO!" You would think that after having defeated the Gators during three of our last four meetings that we'd be used to it by now (ooooh, burn) but this is still some incredible novelty to many of us. Yes, it's a memorable game, and one of the single greatest games in the history of all of Ole Miss football, but to make that the focus of our very successful 2008-9 season is pretty durned foolish.

Unfortunately, this isn't the first time I've seen we Rebels fail to see the forest for the trees. In the original Abner's on the corner of University and South Lamar, there hangs a copy of the 1977 Notre Dame football schedule. The Irish were crowned the national champions of that season despite having one blemish on their record: a 20-13 loss to Ole Miss in Jackson. At that game, Joe Montana sat on the bench as the backup quarterback for the Irish as he watched the domers shock the country by falling to the Ole Miss Rebels.

Yet, this example is different from its modern counterpart because, for those times, such celebration of a single game was necessary. This is because the 1977 Ole Miss season was pretty forgettable otherwise. The Rebs finished that season without a bowl appearance, having lost to Alabama, Auburn, Georgia, Mississippi State, LSU and *gulp* Southern Miss (the State game was later forfeited, but still).

Why do this? Do you think this hurts the feelings of Florida fans or something? Well, it doesn't. After watching the BCS title game at a bar armed to the teeth with Florida fans, an Ole Miss cohort of mine began shouting "we beat the national champions!" The Florida fans effected enough to respond generally said things along the lines of "WHOOOOOOOO FUCK YES MOTHERFUCK YEAH BCS CHAMPS MOTHERFUCKERS!"

A few of them even thanked us for "lighting a fire under their asses" and took the time to congratulate us on our win over Texas Tech.

"The SEC owns the Big XII, broseph!" Yeah, I got that and, while incredibly douchey in that uniquely Florida way, it goes to show that our win over them isn't so much a blip on their radar screen. Hell, most Florida fans are glad they lost to us early in the season as opposed to shitting the bed against someone else (Florida State, Bama) with bigger BCS implications later on.

We became a nail in Tommy Tuberville's pine box, royally embarrassed LSU in Tiger Stadium, and stunned 90-something-percent of Americans after smacking around the Texas Tech Red Raiders of the "mighty" Big XII South. Yet, all some of us seem to give a rat's ass about was beating Florida in the Swamp.

We're the shin snappin', fin slangin', Jevan Snead and Dexter McCluster havin' Cotton Bowl Champions. We're not some bullshit, vicarious National Champions. Let's quit dwelling on that game and focus on our successful season at large.

Of course, it's more than alright to have cheered for the Gators in the BCS Championship Game. The Sooners are a dastardly, bastardly group and, as a fan of an SEC school (that isn't Georgia), you're expected to pull for the Gators in such a situation. But you should pull for them for the sake of the conference as a whole; not just for the benefit of Ole Miss. Their defeat of Oklahoma marked the third consecutive year in which the crystal football was hoisted high by SEC hands which makes, not just one, but five of our victories that much more impressive. The SEC IS the best conference out there and we no longer need to waste our time trying to prove that.



P.S. - Alright, I will admit that making Tim Tebow cry still reminds me of all of the good things in life (Sex, pie, the 2nd Amendment, et cetera)

P.P.S. - Oh, and to whoever my temporary "broseph" may have been that evening: the SEC does, in fact, own the Big XII. Suck it, SEC haters.

National Championship Questions

Not lost on regular followers of The Cup is that fact that the Southeastern Conference is likely to house the national champion for the third year in a row after Florida plays Oklahoma tonight in Miami or the fact that Southeastern Conference teams are undefeated in the BCS National Championship Game. Often lost in the luster of the SEC's brilliance on the biggest stage of all is the Big 12's record in this game - though our readers can likely recall it as easy as I can. Underdogs Oklahoma and Texas claimed victories in 2000 and 2005, favorite Oklahoma failed against LSU in 2003, and heavy underdogs Nebraska and Oklahoma fell even short of low expectations in 2001 and 2004. Claiming five appearances in the first ten games, the Big 12 has avoided the reputation of being a group of title game disappointments exclusively because of the superpower of Vince Young and the futility of Ohio State.

While the past is prologue, though, this game takes place in shiny, new 2009. Lingering questions about these particular editions of these particular teams exist.

Is Chris Brown enough to keep this offense two-dimensional?
Demarco Murray, Oklahoma's All-Big 12 running back, is out of the game, leaving the Sooners to rely on Murray's backup, Chris Brown. Of course, Brown, the 210-pound junior, pulled down 1110 yards this season running behind the kind of girth one might expect from Oklahoma's offensive line. But, in the Sooners' biggest game against the Texas Longhorns, Brown touched the ball 7 times. Brown does not have credibility in the high-pressure situations. Nevertheless, with three Conference First Teamers rumbling in front of him, Oklahoma will force Florida to respect the ground.

Is SEC speed going to folks' heads?
If someone writes a paragraph about the National Championship Game, the speed of the Southeastern Conference might be referenced more than any other person or concept associated with this contest. Can Oklahoma match Florida's speed? The Gators are, no doubt, fast with, reportedly, five players on the team clocking sub-4.2 times in the forty. Maddeningly fragile Percy Harvin is one of them and will be about 90% healthy tonight. And besides, Florida has outstanding speed in the secondary that promises to frustrate Sam Bradford's oft-hailed accuracy. But, it might not even be the most important statistic. Doesn't anyone care about, oh I don't know, margin of victory? The Gators beat opponents by an average of 34.2 points, while Oklahoma won by an average margin of 29.5 points. But Florida's speed might be a game-changer against Oklahoma's moribund special teams.

Why isn't anyone talking about Oklahoma's most famous athlete alumnus, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin?
Because wrestling is "sports entertainment, not sports.

Wait, doesn't Florida have an offense, too?
Oh, yeah, they do! Damndest thing, huh? Florida scored over 40 points against top-50 defenses LSU (36), Kentucky (37), Georgia (28), Vanderbilt (29), South Carolina (11), and Florida State (13). Oklahoma has faced two top 50 defenses, against which they scored less than 40 points. Those statistics need to be controlled for the fact that the SEC teams listed above only faced one offense (Florida, themselves) that would turn any heads.

Would Ole Miss beat Oklahoma by more than five touchdowns?
Certainly.

Does this game definitively answer the conference dominance question for 2008?
Absolutely. If Oklahoma wins, the Big 12 will finish with a 5-3 record in the bowl season, two BCS winners, and the National Champion. But, if the Gators win, the Southeastern Conference will finish 6-2 in bowls with two wins over Big 12 teams. The Pac-10 can flaunt its gaudy 5-0 bowl record until it is blue in the face, but that does not redeem the putrid record of its five teams with losing seasons. The discussion is clearly between the Big 12 and the SEC. Tonight's game settles that discussion, as well.

What in the Hell is wrong with Florida?

Jamar Hornsby Commits

Jamar Hornsby, a former Florida Gator and coveted high school prospect, committed to the Rebels over the weekend. If you'll remember, the prospect of his commitment caused a bit of a stir in one of our comments threads.

Hornsby was kicked off of the Florida squad when criminal charges of credit card fraud were brought against him. Hornsby got a hold of a credit card belonging to the deceased girlfriend of one of his (also deceased) teammates and ran up a few thousand dollars worth of charges on it. As despicable as that may initially seem, there have been rumors circulating a few Ole Miss forums that there is much more to this story than was initially reported.

Per the story, the card wasn't a credit card per se, but rather a prepaid card. Jamar discovered it in an apartment and, upon notifying the young woman's parents, he was allowed to keep the card. After using it with permission for several months, the University of Florida's athletic department got wind of this and, fearing NCAA sanctions surrounding the card (could it be construed as an illegal gift or benefit?), generated criminal charges to remove Hornsby from the team.

Is this alternate story true? Hell if I know. It wouldn't shock me if it were but, until I see or hear something other than sports forum chatter, I'm not going to bite.

You're Welcome, Tim

Jamar Hornsby?

Per reports on Rivals and various message boards, former Florida Gator safety Jamar Hornsby is interested in becoming a part of our beloved Rebels. Hornsby, a former 4-star athlete out of Jacksonville, deservedly gained his fair share of notoriety earlier this year when he was found guilty of credit card fraud.

Oh, but this wasn't some simple ol' "I haxxor3d ur Ebayz" credit card fraud. No, no. This was credit card fraud of the "my teammate and his girlfriend died in a motorcycle wreck so now I'm using her card to snatch up some 5 dollar footlongs" variety.

Eesh...

My question to you, the faithful readers of Le Cup, is "would you take him?" Personally, I'm a bit torn. While I'd love to have a large (6'3", 195lbs in high school), athletic safety anchor our secondary, I don't know if that's the kind of press Ole Miss needs.

Let us know what you think.

Ole Miss is on da teebee!

This first clip comes from a respected journalist:

This second clip doesn't, but it's waaaaaaaay more entertaining:

Is this the most press Ole Miss has ever gotten? Yeah, likely so. The last week has truly been an incredible week for our university.

And another thing... I bet Shep reads the Red [REDACTED] Cup. I'm not joking around here, I'm serious. I bet he does. And you know what? I bet he enjoys the hell out of it. Shep, we're glad to have you. Keep doing whatever it is that you do.

Has Urban Meyer Been 'Exposed?'

After the game Saturday in Gainesville (still working on that photo-journal), Florida fans were about as nice to me and my party as I could ever have expected. Seriously, I've made Ole Miss games at Kentucky, Mississippi State, LSU, Georgia, and, now, Florida. With the possible exception of my 2003 trip to Starkville, when the dejected dogs were in hospitable awe over young Mr. Manning, Gator fans were sometimes welcoming and rarely annoying last Saturday.

Perhaps "hospitable" is not the right word. Maybe they were just a little self-absorbed. When I led chants of "Hit Tebow," I wasn't met with glares or jeers from Jort Nation, rather a few cries of "...but don't hurt him." Before and during the game, Gators were so caught up in their own glory that they simply were left without sufficient time or energy to worry about heckling lowly Rebel fans.

And, after the game, the abuse we expected never really materialized. On the way out of Gainesville, I realized that Florida fans were still internalizing - this time, though, it was not glory they were caught up in. It was the blame, pity, and coach-loathing that is summed up by a statement a Florida fan laid on me yesterday - "Urban Meyer has been exposed."

I think that's a little silly.

Urban Meyer has not been exposed after this weekend anymore than Nick Saban has been legitimized. This win can't silence the doomsday squeals from Fayetteville that this was the first step in Houston Nutt's diabolical plan to destroy Ole Miss football. One weekend really does not reveal a great deal about a man's coaching ability. Except sometimes.

The main point of contention, ironically for Rebel fans, was a decision to go for it on fourth down. Urban could have passed over the middle. I'll arbitrarily say that had an 80% chance at completion - it'd been working all day, except when Tebow's receivers dropped the ball. Urban could have kicked the field goal, which I'll arbitrarily assign 50%. It would have been a career long for his freshman kicker. Urban could have floated a screen pass to Percy Harvin in the flat - maybe 70% - but we'd gotten losses in the flat, and Percy had already coughed up the ball twice that day. What had worked all day long? Tebow up the middle. What saved Florida from a sure Oregeron-ing in 2007? Tebow up the middle. If the reasonable, prudent person called this offensive play in a vacuum, knowing neither the score nor the opposition, what play would anyone call for Florida on 4th and 1? Tebow up the middle.

It's the obvious call because it's the right call.

Florida's three lost fumbles "exposes" nothing about Urban Meyer. But don't tell that to Florida fans. They probably can't hear you over the sound of Tebow's post-game press conference replaying over and over in their heads.

The "analysts" have a lot to say

You wanna know how to get all over the teebee? You defeat the #4 Gators in the Swamp, that's how. I'm sure you've all seen something on ESPN, Fox Sports, etc but I bet many of you haven't seen this little gem. Warning, if you don't like vulgar ejaculatory references, then watch this video instead.

(Houston Nutt) worked them bitches!
The fella on the right is hilarious, the fella on the left is a douche. He refers to us as "Mississippi" while sporting his totally rad Florida jersey and cleanly shaven head. Doooouuuuuche. Chompy-chomp, you douche.

More fun captions!

This is fun. This needs to become a recurring theme on this blog, don't you think? Mafpwtac, a regular over at NAFOOM sent these pictures to the RSC inbox and I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.



Oh, and I made this one after seeing his inspirational poster fark:I also think "PRISON: This is what it looks like" would be pretty damned appropriate for that image. If you've got 'em, keep 'em coming.

Caption this picture

Ted Laurent going after Tebow is just too good for us. We want to come up with a clever caption for this picture. We tried.
Here are our shots and, if you've got something more creative or humorous please share it with us. Remember, we've got the domain name, but you're actually the smart ones.

A Tale of Two Quarterbacks

It was the best of times,


it was the worst of times.

Guess who has an all time winning record against Florida? Georgia, you say? Well, yeah, they do. Tennessee? Not so fast. LSU? Nope.

How about the motherfucking Ole Miss motherfucking Rebels. 12-10-1, bitches. What a great 24 hours for Ole Miss.

HOTTY DAMN TODDY!

We'll obviously have a better post up, but for now, enjoy this....

WE ARE... OLE MISS!

Hey Florida

Do you remember the greatest day of Matt Grier's life? What? You don't? Ok, here's a hint: it was likely also one of Rex Grossman's worst.

Still no clue? Well, try this shit on for size:


The best lines from this video are, in my opinion

Ooh... giddy up!

from the first video, and

It's Matt Grier AGAIN!

from the second. CBS sure does hire some goofy announcers.

Rex Grossman will forever be Matt Grier's bitch. Damn that video makes me all goose-bumpy.


HT: MakersMarkReb who, by the way, is hung like Matt F'in Grier

Who Is This Guy? Tim Tebow.

Okay, so you've likely heard of Tim Tebow. He won some trophy. Also, were he not saving the whales from the pandas (or something like that), he has the surely has the capacity to do some all-star debauching. But this is Superman, not Lex Luthor. He uses his powers for good and not evil.

What exactly can Superman do? Well, he can complete 145 passes without throwing an interception, shattering Danny Wuerffel's record of 121. He can shatter Emmitt Smith's career rushing TD record (36) sometime in the next few weeks (he has 31 ... for now). He's also able to leap over large objects in a single bound.

But what does Clark Kent do? You know, besides medical mission trips and all that. That is actually a pretty good question. I don't know the answer.

Oh, yeah. That.