Post-game Analysis

I had surgery Friday morning under general anesthesia. Not only was I still tired and sore Saturday, I couldn’t drink, what with all the painkillers swimming in my system. I tell you that to tell you this: my intent is for these weekly postgame write-ups to be drunken, shit-talkin’ rants, hopefully with enough analytical observations to differentiate it from an SBR post on NAFOOM (which was particularly inspiring this week, by the way). This week, however, life, as well as hydrocodone, got in the way…

All of that aside, Memphis: don’t let the door hit you in the ass. Have fun with your basketball team full of choke job criminals, and don’t ever come here again. We’ve got BCS teams to play, and (hopefully) a coach that can beat some of them. Here’s the thing Tigers: we didn’t even play that well, save for Shay Hodge, Dexter McCluster, and Brandon Bolden. Snead, Wallace, and essentially the entire defense had an off night, and you still got run over. Garrett Ryan and Chris Bowers played extensively. We used five running backs. Andy Hartmann almost scored. You suck completely (though apparently, you’d have knocked off State or Texas A&M yesterday). A few other observations not involving how much Memphis sucks…

Offensive play-calling was exceptional. Not sure how often Snead changed plays around, but it seemed like Nutt and Austin always had guys in place to make big plays.

Run-blocking was a little disappointing. Still want to see Oher, Jerry and co. knock people around. We had trouble running up the middle. This might have been a result of Memphis trying to make Snead beat them. Or we might still be soft.

It was disappointing that we only had big performances from two receivers. Wallace was open deep a lot, but couldn’t haul it in, and Summers, Harris, and Breaux were non-factors. Jason Cook has nice hands, and I love having that option in the offense. It’d be great if the tailbacks could get involved in the passing game, too.

So yeah, about Enrique Davis being a second team all-SEC back? Not gonna happen. Bolden will steal lots of carries. Kid has great skills.

Defensively, defending the spread is a pain in the ass. You pretty much have to recruit against it, and we haven’t been doing it. You don’t want to bring out a defense built to stop bubble screens against teams like LSU and Georgia. Still, defense was disappointing on a number of levels.

In the trip receiver sets that Memphis almost always ran, we had the flanker shadowed by a safety lined up several yards back, allowing him to catch it with room to build up a head of steam and hide behind his blockers. If we know they want the screen, why not jam up all three receivers? Could be totally off base here, I have never personally defended the spread.

Emmanuel Stevens and Kentrell Lockett are adequate starters, but may not be much more. We won’t be generating many sacks without Hardy. We tried to disguise blitzes, but didn’t execute them very well. There isn’t any substitute for pressure generated by the front four. Garrett Ryan knocked down a pass at the line. Hell yeah, Ryan, that’s a story to tell your grandkids. Also good to see Bowers out there; he’s played whenever he’s been healthy, so hopefully he’ll finish up the year and continue to contribute.

Linebackers: hit somebody. Please. Jamarca Sanford and Kendrick Lewis are upstaging the linebacking corps (that’s ‘linebacking core,’ Yancy Porter fans) that we’ve been excited about recently. Lamar Brumfield is going to get picked on. Coverage skills don’t look so hot, and if offenses can draw him in, his side will be vulnerable to outside runs. Deer Allen Walker: pleez to git all better soon. Kthnxbai.

Corners weren’t awful. Most of the time, they did a good job of keeping the play in front of them, but you’ve got to step up and be aggressive sometimes. I’d like to see more of Marshay Green. His athleticism and toughness are great assets. The corners got burned a couple of times, but Hudgens threw some really good balls, and all along we knew the Memphis receivers would get theirs. Calhoun would probably be our best receiver. If Shay Hodge wasn’t such a badass.

That about does it for the postgame analysis, save for a few side notes:

Jumbotron. Good job, Pete. Also, I appreciate the ribbon boards much more than I did last year, especially when they bring to me good tidings of State going down in flames.

Parents. I know you love your children. Please understand that everyone else hates them. Don’t let your kids bring scooters to the Grove. They go from being mere nuisances to fearsome pre-pubescent projectiles of death for old people, cripples (like me!), and oblivious sorority girls everywhere. Cut. That. Shit. Out.

Officials. Offensive pass interference. Carlos Singleton is still pushing off on Dustin Mouzon. Call it.

Memphis fans. Has our teasing finally hurt your feelings? I saw fewer pairs of jorts than ever before. I saw nary a jort/mullet combo all day. And I was a little sad inside.

Rh0d3$t@rzorz (or however you spell it). You win the 'Best Drunk In My General Vicinity' award. Party on.

Wake Forest. Now that we have a method of getting Shay Hodge and Dexter McCluster the ball consistently (the ‘accurate forward pass method,’ specifically), you best watch it.

Until next time.

Tuesday Question

Generally, we are the "authors" of "content" around here - "here" being a blog and not a message board. Recognize, we do, that you've come here not to contribute, but to consume. Nevertheless, there is the sporadic occasion where, either for our benefit or for to exercise the thinkifiers of the masses, we ask you a question. Today's question is ...

Is Memphis a Rival?

Although it's fairly pathetic for this to be the case during the very first week of football, jobs and school have a lot of us Cuppers weighed down a good bit. Therefore, to keep it lively around here, we'd like to open up this Tuesday with a question which, if we're lucky, may lead to a brief discussion or even a debate. Today's question is: "Is Memphis truly a rival of ours?"

Many say it isn't. They cite a real lack of competitiveness between the teams, conference disparities, and a lack in tradition (when compared to LSU and State).

Many say it is. They cite EA Sports, proximity, and good ol' fashioned hatred.

What say you?

Internets Available in Memphis (Public Libraries); Accessed by Tiger High Alums

Losing to LSU is never fun, but is accepted, any loss to State stings for quite some time, but nothing gets to me more than not being able to beat these BCS rejects down in Memphis.

The talking heads on Memphis radio and the UTK rejects on MemphisTigers.org start spewing their delusional and ill-informed opinions regarding the Ole Miss game around this time every year.

Today’s example comes courtesy of MT.org poster, MemphisCanes.

"For all that they toute their recievers, ours are head and shoulders (figuratively AND literally) above theirs."

You win Tiger fans, those receivers (“I” before “e” except after “c”) that we constantly “toute” are not as tall as Carlos Singleton. Let us take a look at some statistics though, and remember you run a pass happy offense in the CUSA while we had two incompetent rejects playing quarterback for us last season.

Last season your top three receivers were Duke Calhoun (14 ypc), Carlos Singleton (15.0 ypc), and Stephen Black (11 ypc). Our top three WRs were Shay Hodge (14 ypc), Mike Wallace (19 ypc), and Dexter McCluster (12 ypc). These stats seem pretty even to me. I will give you the advantage in WRs, but your guys are not as good as you all make them seem to be, with the exception of Duke Calhoun.

"Oher is an anchor, but one lineman does not a line make."

Does not a line make? Really? Was that just some cute way of trying to make your point or your fine Memphis education? And you are correct in saying one lineman does not make an offensive line. That is why we have guys like pre-season second team All-SEC John Jerry, returning starter Reid Neely, and veterans Darryl Harris and Mo Miller. To steal a quote from an Ole Miss poster on MT.org, "Our offensive line has had more books written about them than your basketball team has read."

In reality, their squad has more question marks than ours. New Coach, new QB, new RB, and a suspect D.

No arguments here except for you bit about suspect defense. The only thing suspect about our defense is going to be the cornerback position. Our front seven boasts 4 All-American or All-SEC candidates and one of the top incoming linebackers in the nation. Again, there is nothing terribly wrong with your statement, but the next part of the sentence (term used loosely considering your last one lacked a verb) is what explains why UTK denied your application and your attendance at Tiger High. It is so ludicrous I am going to have to break it down piece by piece.

“The Tigers have an experienced QB who should be able to plug right in to our system.”

How can you call Arkelon Hall an experienced QB? It is beyond me. We may have a new QB, but at least it is one who has played in a division one-football game against a BCS opponent for the Texas Longhorns. Also, judging by Hall’s less than sterling 6-14 performance, it looks like he has some work to do. However, you probably did not see that because only 800 people went to the game. That is how you support a program!

You cannot win an argument by saying Ole Miss has question marks at positions A, B, and C and then turn around and say the new (read: unproven) players Memphis has coming at the same positions make us a better team, which you proceed to do.

“Walton, our DC, has studied at defensive powerhouses like LSU and Miami, and has brought in considerable JUCO talent this year.”

Our last head coach studied at national powerhouses like Miami and USC, but he could not coach his way out of a paper bag. He still managed to beat you three times in three years. Weird.

And I would love to know this considerable JUCO talent that is coming in this year. Last I heard your prized recruit from Clemson decided North Dakota State was a better fit for him, Tim Mcgee failed his needed summer classes, and no one else on your commitment list looks like they are worth a damn. Your team, especially on defense, is nothing more than a bunch of other team’s rejects who averaged giving up 32 points per game this past season. Oh, and you lost to Arkansas State 35-31.

Add to that our new blood at RB, which should only do more to juice our offense, and I can't really see what Missy fans are so confident about.

So us having new RBs is a negative, but your new running backs are going to put you over the top? I do not think so. You are sending out Curtis Steele, a between the tackles type of runner, with your spotty offensive line against our front seven. I will not even bring up the guy we signed.

“I guess home field advantage must be worth alot in their minds.”

It sure does when you compare it to your home field advantage.